Leak Report: Kim Kardashian ‘Jam (Turn It Up)’

What kind of fuckery is this?

Here’s the deal. I have no problems with Kim Kardashian‘s sudden foray into music if she can back it up with some decent choons.

I’m giving this the benefit of the doubt because honestly, I’ve been known to embrace disposable pop choons that most folks spit on. I’d happily stand by Tyra Banks‘ ‘Shake Ya Body’ and one or two of Paris Hilton‘s tracks but ‘Jam (Turn It Up)’?

Take a listen to the world premiere on Ryan Seacrest‘s show and I’ll give you my verdict after the jump:


 

I’m sorry, gurl. But where is the attitude? Where is the spark and life in your vocals?

I hear the lyrics you’re singing and we can deduce that this is meant to be a party song, but you sound like you’re mumbling to yourself, masticating on gum and twirling your hair throughout the entire recording sesh. That, to me, sounds unprofessional and lazy.

‘Jam (Turn It Up)’ has about as much charisma and appeal as a cork board coaster.

Bitch, if you’re gonna do it, go all out and give us something to really talk about.

Footnotes:

Kim Kardashian‘s ‘Jam (Turn It Up)’ is produced by The-Dream (hitmaker behind Mariah Carey‘s ‘Touch My Body’), and the single is slated for a digital release soon.

Kim has announced that all proceeds of the single will go to St Jude’s Children Research Hospital. Sweet gesture but the right thing to do is for ya’ll to find out how to make a direct donation yourself so you’re not boosting her sales.

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2 Comments

  1. This is DREADFUL – if the money’s going to charity the poor kids better cross there fingers someone buys this.
    Poor little things will be lucky to say a hundred bucks!

    • I know, Leo. And you know how forgiving I can be with these hos who suddenly decide they wanna sing.

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